This is what Tinder say about it’s app :-
“Tinder is the fun way to connect with new and interesting people around you. Swipe right to like or left to pass. If someone likes you back, it’s a match! Chat with a match or snap a photo to share a Moment with all of your matches at once. It’s a new way to express yourself and share with friends.”
You sign up using your Facebook account, it copies some basic information across (First name, age, intro and photo access) and you are away.
I’ve been trialing Tinder for a couple of months now and have drawn the following conclusions from the ever popular app.
- A LOT of people use Tinder, in fact most people you know, single, not single who are maybe just bored are on the app. So if you are trying to go incognito, be aware that you will be seen by friends and colleagues.
- The fact that its so simple to sign up, people appear very flippant with its use, I think it can just be a casual time filler for some.
- It’s a bit like window shopping for partners. When you window shop you don’t necessarily buy or go in to try it on.
- Due to the volume of people that use Tinder and how many matches you get, your window of opportunity with people is very very small, I’ll go into this more with my tips.
- Your location can affect your results dramatically, if you do not live in a major city like London, then Tinder members will be very thin on the ground.
- Tinder is not just a hook-up tool, yes admittedly some people use it for that but that’s just a reflection of real life. Be clear what you are looking for and you can meet some great people.
So… on to my Tinder tips, these are based on my experiences, I don’t claim to be a Tinder expert, but then who is?
Profile and Picture Tips.
- You can create a separate Facebook account just for Tinder, lots of people advise you do this, personally I don’t see the point unless you feel you need to lie about your age. I just created a folder for pictures I wanted to use on Tinder just to make it easier and then you can edit the intro in Tinder itself, so no major dramas there.
- The pictures are crucial, its pretty much all anyone has to go on when they within a few seconds decide to swipe left or right. Make sure your picture is not too dark. I come across this a lot, you get a silhouette of a picture where you can’t see the person at all…. It’s an immediate swipe left, either increase the brightness or DON’T use the picture.
- DON’T put a group picture on as your first photo, otherwise no one will know which one you are. DO put a group picture in on a later one but make sure the people you are with are not those extra trendy stunning model worthy mates who show you up to be the lesser well blessed with looks. So many times I’ve seen group shots and the individual is clearly trying to make themselves better looking by association, it doesn’t work.
- DO put up more than one picture, its hard to see what someone looks like from just one picture, especially if it’s not that good.
- DO make sure the resolution of the picture is ok, once you select it, check your profile and make sure its not too fuzzy. I don’t know how people manage to do it but A LOT of peoples pictures are virtually unrecognisable.
- DO NOT wear sunglasses in your pictures, I realise that a lot of people take pictures in the sun or on holiday, but don’t use those for Tinder. Putting up pictures where your face is 1/3rd covered by your chosen tinted plastic is not a great start.
- This may seem obvious but I’ve been astounded by this one. If it’s a bad picture of you, DO NOT put it up. If you find it hard to get a picture then ask a friend to take one, its so easy on mobiles now to even post them straight to Facebook in seconds.
- DO NOT use professional shoot pictures. You know the ones you get for a present to have a modeling experience? I come across these a lot. They are not an accurate representation of what you look like, you may look great in them but risk your potential date blowing you out when they realise you don’t look like your highly Photoshopped pictures in person.
So in summary, your profile is all about your pictures, this will make or break your success on matches so make sure you get it right.
Tinder Dating Tips.
- As already mentioned, competition is fierce on Tinder, you have to act fast with any matches. Women especially take note on how quickly you message them after a match. Yes they do wait for you to message them, its rare to get a first message from a women. So when you have a match, instigate a conversation as quickly as you can.
- Due to the volume of matches most people get, you have to escalate that person quickly. What I usually do after a few tinder messages with someone I’m interested in meeting is offer to jump off Tinder and onto What’sapp or Text. How? This is the simple one liner I use “Hey I rarely use Tinder I don’t really have time for it, but id like to get to know you more, lets swap to What’sapp” and offer them your number. 98% of the time this works, the other 2% that either don’t respond at all, or come up with some excuse not to swap numbers are usually the ones that are not serious about meeting. It’s a fast way to filter those out.
- DON’T get stuck in endless messaging on Tinder or What’sapp. You have to continue progressing that match, it’s fine to throw a few texts around to get a bit of a feel for a person but you need to progress that to a call and your goal a first date. Again if the person is very adverse to speaking on the phone, you may need to move on. It could be that they are not actually single or again just not serious about meeting and filling some time. Speaking on the phone makes you a person and not just a picture. Get a call in ASAP.
- DON’T get stuck being the one who travels all the way to your date. There are some convenience only daters out there who are happy for their date to come to the pub/cafe at the end of their street but will never commit to anywhere outside of their area. Will not bode well when you have spent all that time traveling and you find out that they will never leave their comfort zone. Meeting half way between you is perfectly reasonable.
- All being well you will get some great dates lined up, I recommend keeping it simple for the first couple of dates. A drink in a bar/pub a coffee in a nice cafe (not Starbucks). I’ve fallen into the trap of heavily investing in the initial first dates. Tinder dating is very casual and that’s how people treat it. DON’T go crazy otherwise you will be broke within a month. Keep diners and days out to the 3rd or 4th date when you know its going well. Your date will most likely be dating multiples that week too.
- This may be a bit of a controversial statement but I advise if you have night spare for dating, then arrange at least two. It’s not uncommon to have a cancellation on the day leaving you with a night set aside and no date. I had three arranged one night and one by one two pulled out with very flaky excuses, this harks back to my statement of Tinder being very causal. If your potential date isn’t in the mood to have to glam up and hit the tube to travel to see you, then they will just cancel without too much thought. It’s not personal, but have at least one backup. It’s not hard to meet at least two people in one night, just make them aware that you are quite busy but have an hour or so to meet for a drink and stagger your evening.
I hope these tips will help you get started, Tinder is a great way to meet people, just remember not to take it too seriously, its just another avenue. Don’t use it as your only dating route.
If you have any tips of your own, leave me a comment below.